Today I read an article called "20 Things No One Ever Told Us About Raising a Boy."
I am going to paraphrase the article here to give you the information that I read. I also wrote about what I felt about these unknown factors.
Here are the 20 things...
1. There will be planes, trains, and automobiles: First, I think that I always knew boys generally liked automobiles of all kinds. This really doesn't bother me because my childhood was overwhelming female. I am one of 4 girls and that means we had our fair share of dolls, barbies, makeup, hair items, and easy bake ovens. I should note, I also have a lot of matchbox Mustangs and Die Cast models. I like cars! Whatever Max is into, I am going to try my best to learn about and be interested as well. As for worrying about gender specific toys, I plan to buy educational toys until he can be drawn to something himself. He will work out what is interesting to him.
2. Boys Don't Stop Moving: I am bit in the middle about this one. I certainly feel like I know it due to being an Aunt to two boys. I also feel extremely anxious knowing it. I have been working on being in better shape and losing weight so that keeping up with Max as he becomes mobile won't be so hard on me but I think the better attitude is to see it as a blessing that he is going to be active because it will cause me to be more active. I was a very active child involved in sports and somewhere along the line, I became rather lazy with my body. Maybe this could turn things around?!
3. Clothes Shopping is Easy and Cheap: This one I knew for sure. Two reasons for me knowing this one was that I was a nanny for a boy in California and I would pick out his clothes for him and he was completely satisfied in whatever I chose. In saying that, there wasn't really a strict budget for him as his father gave me plenty to clothe him for the school year and summers. Max will certainly be on more of a budget than he is. So far, it's been extremely cheap to clothe him because my wonderful friends have donated bags of their boys clothing to me and I am pretty much stocked up until 2T entirely. Pretty Nice. Aside from that, I shop at Kid Exchange & Once Upon A Child so that makes it pretty easy and cheap as well.
4. You will love watching him play with his dad: This is an understatement. I really did not know just how precious it would be to watch my son and my husband enjoy time together. There really is nothing sweeter!
5. The Penis Comparison starts early: Ok, I will admit complete and utter ignorance on this one. My Max is only 5 months old and my nephew doesn't seem to be comparing yet at 4 years old so this one is a new one to me.
6. You'll learn to love Legos: Now, this one has taken on a life of it's own. I worked at the after-school program in my hometown last year as a part time job and the Legos caused more problems than any other toy because they are the coveted toys. I will add though that this was true for males and females. Legos are just awesome!
7. Roughhousing is innate: Although I am not seeing this yet in Max, it is completely evident in my nephews. Being rough and "wrestling" seems to be a blast for them and in my opinion probably not going to hurt anyone as long as it is just that..playing!
8. You'll want to mold him into a stellar boyfriend: I already feel the urge for this. When I gave birth to my little man, I thought about him one day being a husband and father and realized that my job was pretty big to raise him correctly to respect women and be a stand up guy.
9. The Goofiness Starts Early: This one I was pretty aware of with my nephew and also my buddy Nick wrote a post about his 7 year old here and the weirdness that ensued when he turned 7. It was entertaining and opens up my eyes to things that might not be so fun but are just part of the boy nature.
10. Even Sweet as Pie Boys Love Guns: This one I have seen some evidence of in my nephew as well because he is not allowed to have play guns in his house and yet, he makes guns out of anything that could possibly resemble a gun so he can be a hero. I think it's the hero concept that is inborn that I mentioned in my blog about man's basic desires. I'm not sure yet where I sit on play guns/Max but when it comes up...I'll let you know
11. You'll learn not to compare your son to girls: This one I learned VERY early with my nieces and nephews. Kaylea (my 3 year old niece) was talking at 6 months and was using full sentences by a year for sure. My nephew Shawn is just now really making sense at 4 years. It has everything to do with their gender. Now, I should also note that Kaylea was not coordinated and still battles fine motor skills where as Shawn could put together a piece of furniture with 1,000 small parts, I am sure. I have accepted that everyone develops as their own rate and we can't compare children. Especially since my son was 2 months early, he is going to most likely reach milestones at his gestational age.
12. Star Wars takes over earlier than you expect: This one I wasn't aware of and don't really care as long as he is watching it when it's appropriate to do so. We are not big on screen time so I'm not sure how this will play out in my house. Anthony is a fan of the star wars movies but they are not played often in my house.
13. You'll probably make a trip to the emergency room: AMEN! Let me tell you the number of things that my nephew has done while I was watching him (thanks dude). He has gotten choked on Spaghetti and I had to go down his throat to get it, he has eaten a glo stick and had a glow in the dark tongue (non toxic thank God), he has sprayed window cleaner repeatedly in his eyes. (Don't Judge, I wasn't a mom and it was where he could reach it), and I took him to the movies where he was completely content to sit and watch (until he dropped his bag of gummy worms) and tried to get down and smashed his mouth on the chair in front of him and started bleeding profusely. Yep, I'm ready for these types of things!
14. Sports Obsession can be hard wired: I'm glad this one says CAN BE because I know plenty of guys that this is just not their thing. I also know the ones who it is. I think that this is all about interests and can take any form possible. I will say that I've noticed that even those of the men in my life who aren't huge on sports can still have fun throwing a ball around or shooting hoops here and there.
15. Pee will be everywhere. Everywhere: Yep, sure do know this one. My nephew has peed in the shower, laundry hamper, behind his curtains, and sometimes even in the toilet. He is also the little guy who dropped his pants in the backyard and when we questioned him, he calmly said "I had to poop!" His house was right there and he was closer going to the toilet. Who knows?!
16. You will struggle with gender roles: I'm not sure about this yet. My nephew has certainly enjoyed playing with his cousin's dolls and likes to play dress up and sometimes that means, a dress. My sister is very chill about it but I guess we'll have to see what happens when the rubber meets the road for me. I don't THINK I'll have a problem with it.
17. You will revise your wedding fantasies, and be fine with it: For me, Weddings are a bit taboo so wedding fantasies are not really present in my life. I think this will help me to keep my expectations small and manageable for Max. Anthony and I went to Vegas and got married with very few people we knew and loved and loved every minute of it! Not a big wedding girl!
18. Boys sometimes need to hug it out: This one I learned from my husband. Anthony is a VERY affectionate man and I think that for that reason, Max probably will be too. I have always known that Anthony needs to be soothed by hugs and cuddles so why wouldn't Max. I often hold him tight and tell him everything is going to be alright and Mama loves him. I think affection is a basic human need, period!
19. You will throw away a ton of clothes: HA HA good thing I buy them super cheap at second hand places that are awesome. I am usually losing no more than a couple of bucks!
20. Boys Love their Moms: First of all, YAY!!! Second, I am aware. It is so funny. In my house, Anthony does the morning shift of baby care before he goes to work in the afternoon. I usually get things done I need to get done in the mornings like shopping, laundry, etc... or I get a few extra minutes of sleep to be able to handle the day. As soon as Max sees me in the morning, he is all smiles and he is kicking his feet almost to say "There she is...my favorite person...MOMMMY!!!" It's my favorite part of the day!
Well, what did you learn? Anything? Any moms out there of boys have anything to add to things you didn't know before raising a boy but now you do. I would appreciate any knowledge that could come before approaching these things!!!
--Anthony, Erica, & Maxwell--
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